Coping with Fear of Violent Crime

Whether it is the September 11th attacks, anthrax scares, child abductions, random sniper attacks, or some other high-profile violent crime, it seems Americans are besieged by an onslaught of unpredictable, senseless violence against innocent people. In consequence, more of us are experiencing increased anxiety and fear as we go about our daily lives. These fears, if persistent, can result in more stress-related illnesses, decreased productivity at work, and poorer quality of life.

But is such intense and persistent fear really justified? Are we in greater danger than in the past? FBI statistics on the rate of violent crimes in the U.S. indicate that we are actually safer now than we have been at any time since 1978. This of course does nothing to assuage the pain of those whose lives have been directly touched by violent crime, but it is important information for the rest of us, to help us keep it all in perspective. As we shall see, putting the amount of damage, and our individual risk of being victimized, into perspective is one of the keys to coping with the fear of violent crime.

Tips for Coping with Fear

This section covers some thoughts to ponder and steps to take when one is feeling increased fear and anxiety as a result of high profile crimes in the media. This is intended for those whose lives have not been directly impacted by these crimes. Those who have been directly impacted may instead want to seek professional help or support services.

• Again, the first step is to put the amount of damage done, and future risk, into perspective. We are a large country, with a population of over 288 million. The numbers of violent crimes are small when considered as a percentage of the population. When narrowed down to crimes committed by strangers, at random, that number is much smaller.
• One of the best ways to manage any kind of fear is to become educated about the nature of the threat. The more we know about the current danger, the more effective steps we can take to minimize our risk of becoming victims. Accurate information is also the best antidote to unrealistic fears. For example, were you aware that anthrax cannot be transmitted from one infected person to another, or that more children die of the flu and food-borne illnesses each year than at the hands of abductors?
• Be always aware, but not always fearful. Awareness means paying attention to your surroundings, noticing anything unusual about people and their behavior. But awareness does not equate to being fearful; in fact, constant, unwarranted fear is counter-productive. It is a focus on what could happen, and as such means you are less aware of what is happening. A sudden feeling of fear is an important clue that something may be amiss, but if you are always fearful, that sudden feeling can't emerge as a clue.
• If you notice that you are having strong feelings, acknowledge them to yourself. Don't try to suppress or deny them.
• Talk about your fears or concerns with supportive others. We get emotional support by giving voice to and sharing our concerns.
• Maintain your normal routine and lifestyle as much as possible. This encourages us to feel normal by acting normal.
• Focus on what you do have control over, not what you don't. It is easy to get carried away with fear by the images we see on television, the stories we hear about, and our own thoughts about violent crimes. The average citizen believes there is little he or she can do to prevent an attack, and feels helpless as a result. But while we can't control the bigger picture, we can control the things we do in our own lives that might reduce our risk of being victims. Read the two books at the end of this article, or contact your local police department for information on personal safety. You'll learn a lot that you probably didn't know.
• Turn off the television. Once you have gotten the facts, don't keep watching replays of events, and discussion of the "what ifs" ("What if the bomb had been twice as large!") Television news coverage tends to be sensational; they have to compete for viewers, and one way they do it is with sensationalized stories and side stories, commentary, sound and video clips that arouse emotion. When you are feeling tense and have had enough, why not read a newspaper or magazine instead, or do something lighthearted and fun?
• Make sure you get enough rest and eat a healthy diet so that you feel your best.
• When you feel tense, don't just sit there, do something. Staying active helps. Take a walk, get some exercise, tinker around the shop or garden.
• Avoid destructive behaviors such as substance abuse, workaholism, cynicism, isolating yourself, and shutting down your emotions.
• Practice relaxation techniques such as deep breathing or meditation. These will help you maintain control over the physical symptoms of anxiety.

Helping Your Children Cope with Fears Related to Violent Crimes

Our children are particularly vulnerable to fears in the wake of violent crimes. They have a harder time than we do of understanding what is happening and putting it into perspective. For this reason, we need to pay special attention to their needs. Here are some tips for doing this:

• Give them honest information about the traumatic event(s), at the level they can comprehend. Don't "shield" them with euphemisms or distortions of the facts.
• Encourage your children to talk to you about their thoughts and feelings related to the event(s).
• Listen to their concerns, then reassure them. For example, as explained above, point out that this is limited to a small number of people, and the risk to any particular individual is very low.
• Limit your child's exposure to broadcast news media. Watching repeated images of the event can be as disturbing to a child as if it were happening anew each time. When you do let them watch the news, watch it with them and discuss it afterwards.
• Maintain family routines, particularly around meals, bedtimes, and scheduled social and leisure activities. Provide soothing activities such as riding bikes or taking a walk together, reading to them (or depending on their age, having them read), and playing board games as a family.
• Be especially patient with your children, your spouse and yourself. Hug them and tell them you love them.
• Expose them to stories about heroes, volunteers and public servants, as an antidote to the negative event(s).
• Provide your child opportunities to volunteer and perform community service.

Two excellent books on this subject are The Gift of Fear and Fear Less, both by Gavin De Becker.